Types of Women in Mumbai Local Trains

Living in Mumbai, it’s impossible that you’ve never travelled in the famous local train.

Whether you’re a regular commuter or a one-timer, at one point of time let’s admit it, we’ve all been there. (Unless you’re unfortunate enough to not even ride once)

Since the past one year, I have been travelling for over 12 stations daily in the Ladies coach. So it’s safe to say that I am qualified and well experienced to tell you the types of characters..sorry to say, women I have come across in my journey.

It’s hot. It’s crazy. It’s unbearable! But it’s one hell of an experience.

And you know what makes it interesting? Let’s find out:

1. Self-proclaimed Queens – ‘FIRST-CLASSERS’

Attitude when they issue a First-Class Pass for the first time: ‘Second class is sooooo crowded. There is “no breathing place!I have to look respectable when I reach work.”

 

Attitude after a month: Honestly during rush hour. NOTHING MATTERS. How do these women even manage?

 

 

2. One-time First-Class Ticketers

Attitude on purchase of ticket: “It’s better to travel in first class. ” My outfit and make-up should be in one piece when I reach the event.”

Attitude after getting off of the train: “It wasn’t that crowded today. I wasted my money.”

 

3. The Pushers

Attitude when they board the train: “Arey aagey jagah bohot hai. Aagey jao! (Just go ahead you idiot!)

 

Attitude when they finally get ‘ahead’: “Don’t push me. Can’t you see there is no place ahead?”

 

 

 

4. The ‘fourth’ seaters

Women who ask for a fourth seat on three-seater bench just to fit half of their bum.

Attitude when asking for a seat: “Excuse me. Just shift na little.”

Attitude when asked for a seat by someone else: “Can’t you see there’s no place at all? Should I sit in your lap?”

 

 

5. The Adventurous Foot-board lovers

Attitude before boarding the train: “Standing on the footboard is the best. At least it’s windy and I won’t die of suffocation.”

Attitude after boarding the train: “Can’t you see I’m standing on the footboard. DON’T PUSH! I will fall!”

 

 

6. The Hair Criers

Women who get ‘hurt’ by hair.

Attitude when someone’s hair touches them: “Aapke baal lag rahe hai” (Your hair is hurting me) “Why do you have to keep your hair open? Its touching my shoulder”

Attitude when their own hair touches someone: “I don’t know what problem these women have with my hair. I am a woman and I will have hair! Bloody idiots.”

 

 

7. The Back-Packers

Women who carry too much/bags larger than some people’s homes.

Attitude when someone tells them that their bag is causing inconvenience: “I can’t put my bag on my head! If you can’t adjust, then get off.”

Attitude when compartment is empty: “Let me put my bag up in the stand. Then I can sit peacefully and nobody will get hurt.”

 

 

8.  The  Badass Freebies

Ticket-less women commuters.

Attitude when caught without a ticket in first class: “I’m new to Mumbai. I didn’t know this is first class. I’m travelling in the local train for the first time. Mujhe marathi nahi aata”

Attitude when caught without a ticket in second class: My uncle is the hospital and I couldn’t wait in the long ticket line. I’m already very late. Please let me go.”

 

 

9. The Double-Standard Queens

Attitude when buying from hawkers in the train: “30rs is too much for this earring. 20 mein done kardo. (Rs20 is good enough)”

Attitude when buying from malls: “Dude its just 700 for this piece. That’s a throwaway price!”

 

 

10. Cat-fighters

Fighting in First Class: *fights in English* “Just shut up you bitch! No you’re a bitch!”

Fighting in Second Class: *fights in Hindi *“Haath peechche kar. Muh tod dungi!”

 

P.S – I am 5 out of 10 of these women.

Mumbai Local Trains – We crib and we cry but always continue to travel by.